I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
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