This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
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