My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
