today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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