I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Randomize
