his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
Randomize
