i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
It's just like the Real World with babies
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
Randomize