party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
