that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
the liver wants what the liver wants
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
