Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
operation have a gay friend backfired
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
Randomize