Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Randomize
