i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
Randomize
