Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
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