Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
This baby is an asshole
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
Can't talk, ducks in the car
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
