My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
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