i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Randomize
