Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
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