Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
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