Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Randomize
