I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
