Hey man sorry I got all grabby
Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Just pee around me
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
Randomize
