Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
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