I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Randomize