I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
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