I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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