I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
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