I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
We just shotgunned beers for America
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
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