Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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