...so i touched it.
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize
