talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
Randomize