dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
