I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
