meet me in the bathroom in 10 mins.
wait what? who are you hooking up with in the bathroom?!
aww shit wrong text.
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
