Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
zippers are such a cool invention
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
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