So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
Randomize
