I think i sorta joined a cult last night
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
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