If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
Randomize
