I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
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