Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Randomize
