Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
You're like the curious george of whores
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
the liver wants what the liver wants
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
Randomize
