Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
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