some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
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