Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
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