i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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