I bet he comes in French.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Randomize
