i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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