we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
Randomize
