I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize