I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
Randomize
