I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
Randomize
